Fulfillment // Flow Discovery

Together against loneliness: is this my new mission?

Felix Harling — Tue, 13 May 2025 09:11:17 +0000

Loneliness affects us all – directly or indirectly. What is often dismissed as an individual destiny turns out, on closer inspection, to be a global challenge with serious consequences for our health, our society and our well-being.

In this article, you will find out why loneliness is one of the most underestimated problems of our time and what approaches there are to counter loneliness.

Moral Ambition: Choosing Problems That Matter

Moral Ambition is about working on a problem that is serious, underestimated and can be solved. The learning circle guide offers a series of global problems that have these characteristics.

An important question is: Do I have the talent and passion to make a meaningful contribution to solving this problem?

From Ikigai To My Mission: "CoCoCo"

In our last learning circle meeting, we discussed our ikigai – the intersection between our own strengths, passion, social needs and opportunities for rewards. Silke added that “ reward” doesn’t just have to be monetary, but can also come from inspiration and appreciation.

For me, this gave rise to my mission: “Creating places of connection and togetherness.” Terms such as co-mmunity, co-creation, co-aching and co-housing characterize this image – summarized in my wake-up call: CoCoCo.

But where is my impact the greatest? Perhaps precisely where community is lacking: in feeling lonely.

What Is Loneliness?

Loneliness occurs when desired social contacts deviate from actual social contacts. It is not simply being alone, but a painful lack of connection.

Loneliness: A Neglected Global Problem

Initial research – see sources at the end of the article – showed me that loneliness is a serious global issue. The WHO is working to put it on the agenda as a priority. According to a report by the U.S. Surgeon General Advisory, more people worldwide suffer from chronic loneliness than from diabetes.

For a long time, loneliness was considered an individual destiny or a taboo subject. However, it affects people of all ages and is increasingly being recognized as a structural problem. The UK established the world’s first Ministry for Loneliness in 2018, while Germany followed suit in 2022 with the Loneliness Competence Network and a national strategy.

Loneliness As a Serious Health Problem

One in four adults experience unwanted social isolation. According to the PM Report, loneliness has a serious impact on health and life expectancy – comparable to the consumption of 15 cigarettes a day (WHO).

Professor Anton Bucher explains that loneliness causes stress, reduces sleep quality and hinders healthy lifestyles. Interestingly, it is not older people who are particularly affected, but teenagers and young adults.

Solutions to Combat Loneliness

Interestingly, “lonely” in German originally meant “to be united”. It has only been associated with social deprivation since the 18th century. In his book “Loneliness – Pain and Blessing”, Anton Bucher describes that there is no single strategy for reducing loneliness (Bucher, page 96).

He distinguishes between the following types of intervention:

Social inclusion: Building friendships, shared leisure activities
Improving social skills: Training in social behavior
Shifting mindsets: e.g. challenging beliefs like “nobody likes me” through mindfulness, meditation, learning journeys
Therapeutic approaches: Important as loneliness is 50% genetically linked and associated with personal characteristics
Technology-based interventions: Use of robots or AI

Insight

My initial research confirms this: Loneliness is serious, underestimated and solvable. All three criteria of Moral Ambition are fulfilled.

And of course – as Bucher also explains – there is also the blessing side of being alone, as I experienced during my workation in Valencia.

That is why I would like to continue this journey. In German, there are just three letters between loneliness (“Einsamkeit”) and togetherness (“Gemeinsamkeit”): GEM.

I want to embark on a journey and look for people who have already found “GEMs” in order to turn loneliness into togetherness again.

Who should I talk to next?

Feel free to share your ideas in the comments.

Sources

Bucher, Anton A. (2024): Einsamkeit – Qual und Segen. Psychologie eines Gegenwarts-Phänomens. Springer.

Kompetenznetz Einsamkeit (2025): Website https://kompetenznetz-einsamkeit.de/, last accessed on April 27, 2025.

PM Report (2024): WHO: Einsamkeit als globale Priorität.
https://pm-report.de/gesundheitswesen/2024/who-einsamkeit-als-globale-prioritaet.html, last accessed on April 27, 2025.

U.S. Surgeon General Advisory (2023): Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation. https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf, last accessed on April 27, 2025.

WHO (2023): Commission on Social Connection, https://www.who.int/groups/commission-on-social-connection, last accessed on April 27, 2025.

My Newsletter: The Dancing Rainbow

I will send bi-monthly insights, reflections and invitations to special events around coaching, peer learning and community building.

It is time to live and learn in all its colors.

A little secret is waiting for you… if you take the first two steps, of course. Please sign up and confirm your registration – and get a first taste of what’s to come.

Let’s stay connected!

The post Together against loneliness: is this my new mission? first appeared on Flow Discovery.

7 Perspectives on 111 Days Early Retirement

Felix Harling — Tue, 22 Apr 2025 10:08:33 +0000

A personal look back - and ahead

I have officially been in “early retirement” for 111 days. Two words that sound more like stagnation – but it was anything but. I started walking, doubting, creating, reflecting.

This text is not a success story. It is an invitation to reflect. I share seven perspectives on this time – very personal, and yet perhaps also a useful mirror for you.

Whether you are in a transitional phase yourself, accompanying people who are facing a change or simply looking for new inspiration,
I hope you find something here that touches, encourages or inspires you.

1. Perspective "How Are You?"

The typical question from neighbors or acquaintances. The usual answer? “Just fine!” or “It’s going well!”
On the surface, I’m surprised at what I’ve already achieved: Website updated, first offer launched, first newsletter sent out.
But when I look deeper, I start to feel uneasy:

Am I using my time properly?
Where are the customers?
Will my own business really take off?

Fortunately, the exchange with coaching peers and in the Moral Ambition Circle helps me to see more clearly. Moreover, clearer about what I really want to work towards in the near future.

The change from the “silver cage” to freedom is both liberating and challenging. New questions arise. However, I am not questioning the decision itself. More on that in a moment.

2. Perspective "What If?"

What would have happened if I had stayed – if I hadn’t signed the contract?

One check of my former inbox is enough: my wonderful team was shattered by a reorg. I wouldn’t have known where I’d end up.
And the corporate theater? Not a single day that I miss it.

3. Perspective "The Gift"

I am grateful. For a fair offer from my employer – not everyone gets a silver handshake like that.

Grateful that I live in a democracy. I am happy to defend this privilege.

And: every new day really is a new gift. I am free to decide what I fill my time with. Just today, in a research interview, I heard the beautiful word “vogelfrei (free like a bird)” as a metaphor for this new phase of life.

I feed my curiosity. Ignite a desire for the future. Thank you to the Ministry of Curiosity and Future Spirit for the new ambassador role.

4. Perspective "January 1st"

New Year’s night. Fireworks with the neighbors. Toasting the new year.

My motto for 2025: I am a buoyant ancestor.

I want more spontaneity. Explore cities. Experience live events. Interactions that honor my values.

“Nurturing connections” – my theme for this year – has developed well.

I have realized: I’d rather make a difference for 100 people than collect 10,000 followers. Because: who will hold my hand on my final bed? I want to be there for the people who are really important to me.

What I have neglected: my connection with nature – and with my camera.

5. Perspective "14 juillet"

How will I look back on the second 111 days in 111 days?
I’ve brushed up on my Spanish. Gathered new impressions on the Mediterranean.

The time with my wife was particularly valuable – because: When a partner’s life changes radically, the relationship dynamic changes too. This is particularly important because we are making an important decision about the future home of our lives.

My learning curve is steep: through co-organizing the lernOS Convention 2025 in Nuremberg, through my work in the Zettelkasten learning circle.

In the Moral Ambition Circle, I am gaining clarity about my “calling”.

I am delighted to have three new coaching clients. And about the collaboration with inspiring coaches who have made the launch of two new offers possible.

6. Perspective "Affection - Aversion"

In the coaching masterclass on saboteurs, I broke patterns and gained practical insights.

What attracts me?

Getting into action. Designing newsletters. Visualizing content. Learning together. Inspiring encounters. Defending freedom and democracy. Conduct research into learning journeys. Exploring housing projects. Snow-covered mountains. Vacation planning.

What repels me?

Anti-democracy. Backward-looking politics. Rich people without attitude. Piles of paper in standing files.

7. Perspective"The Bird"

And what does the bird see from above?

A carpet is being created. The shape is not yet clear. New colors are added. Many threads are still open. Some parts are half-finished. And as a designer, I am weaving with others, opening up, experimenting.

Bottom Line 111 Days Early Retirement

I am very much looking forward to the journey of the next 111 days, and I take the following self-affirming belief with me:
“A wiser part of me deeply knows that I should follow whatever truly resonates with me!”

How have you been in your first 111 days of the year?

Which other perspective would interest you?
Feel free to share your suggestion!

My Newsletter: The Dancing Rainbow

I will send bi-monthly insights, reflections and invitations to special events around coaching, peer learning and community building.

It is time to live and learn in all its colors.

A little secret is waiting for you… if you take the first two steps, of course. Please sign up and confirm your registration – and get a first taste of what’s to come.

Let’s stay connected!

The post 7 Perspectives on 111 Days Early Retirement first appeared on Flow Discovery.